The Life of Me a Writer

Sunday, June 29, 2014

It's a Fixer Upper

  Hello my lovelys!   Recently I have been fixing up parts of my book.  As of late I have been working on my prologue.  My whole story just felt wrong, so I decided to change some things.  I have now set more of a scene for you guys as well as changed the tense to past.  The prologue is in a different point of view than the rest of the book.  The prologue is in third person, while the rest of the story is in first person.  Now here is a HUGE thing I changed... the name is different!  I started thinking about the name, and I thought well, wizards are normally guys, so I changed the title to The First Witch!  I have some more fun surprises held up my sleeve, and I will tell you them in time.  Well, are you ready for your excerpt of the new, and hopefully improved, prologue?  Alrighty, then!

                                             Prologue
      150 A.D.


Gabrielle ran down the rickety staircase in her large, clay house, the stairs creaking from the extra weight placed on them.  
Creak, crick, creak, crick! The stairs went as she sprinted towards the entrance of her house with her Saluki, Trick, running behind her, each almost tripping over the other in their excitement.  Gabrielle was already half way out her home's entrance when she shouted “, Mum, I'm going outside to play with Trick!”  
Before waiting for a response, she was hurdling down the bright green, rolling hills with Trick. 
The sun was sinking in the sky, illuminating Gabrielle's wavy brown hair.  In the light of the sun it looked golden, surrounding her bright blue eyes like a picture frame.
Stopping at the bottom of the hill, Gabrielle searched for a stick among all the greenery.  A twisted 10 inch stick was illuminated by a beam of the sun's light.  Gabrielle picked it up and waved it in front of Trick, making him jump around giddily.
“Fetch, Trick!” Gabrielle said, as she cocked her arm to throw it.  
  She let go of the stick, watching Trick run towards a sea of dandelions, where she threw the stick.  Trick stopped among the yellow sea and looked around.  He started to whine and squeak, unable to find the stick.  His long nose snuffling among the flowers, hoping to catch the scent of the stick.  
Gabrielle was confused.  Where was the stick?  
She turned away from her dog, wondering if she just let go of the stick too early and dropped it behind her, but the answer was a bit more complicated.  The stick was floating!  
Trick ran over and started pawing above his head, hoping to reach the stick, but his attempts were ignored by the awestruck Gabrielle.   
Her eyes were pinned to the stick floating in front of her.
“Wow! What makes it do that?” Gabrielle asked herself, her little toddler voice raising an octave higher in amazement.
“Gabrielle, come back up!  Dinner is-”
The stick dropped with a thud as Gabrielle looked up the hill to see her mum, Tena, standing at the top, her green eyes as big as saucers.

How did you like it?  I would love for all of your opinions!  If you have any ideas for this story or even the prologue, tell me!  I would love to incorporate some of your ideas!

Guys!  I need a cover!  Anyone want to help?  I will give you some picture ideas of what to incorporate...

   sticks

  Saluki

Those are some of the things that would be great to see on the cover!

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